Cancer and depression?

My husband has been in remission from 4th stage lymphoma for 2 years now. I noticed that he doens't seem as happy and recently he came to me and told me that he is depressed and doesn't know if he wants children anymore. I love him and think maybe it is because of the depression, or maybe he's worried about the cancer coming back (it has a high chance of reoccurance...) Any advice?? Has anyone had anything like this happen to them??

Cancer and depression?
My wife has stage 4 lymphoma. She has had it now for 4 years that we know of. I notice her being depressed every so often and what i do is take her out to dinner and joke around with her and she seems to snap right out of it, also she has others friends that she can call and just talk. I try to keep her busy so she hasn't got time to feel sorry for herself, but I am not demanding don't get me wrong, I would never tell her what to do she is a beautiful and loving wife of 18 years. Hope this may help you and your husband.
Reply:Thanks again everyone for all your wonderful answers! To answer a couple questions, we are pretty healthy and we haven't had his sperm count tested. His Dr suggested waiting %26amp; b/c he's young it could change. Also, we are young fortunately and have time on our hands with that. Thanks again! Report It

Reply:For me it seemed like the second year was harder emotionally than the first. I went to a therapist and am on an anti-depressant. I don't know of any other way to combat cancer depression....I was told it is a situational depression and that I most likely won't have to stay on the anti-depressants forever. Good luck, I know it's hard for everyone involved.
Reply:First of all, Congratulations to you both on his remission!!





With cancer we are so uncertain of the future, or if we even have one. To talk of the future is sometimes frightening as we don't know if we will be here or not.





Cancer and chemo also imbalances are hormones and could cause some confusion in many things as well as parenthood.





He should talk to his Dr. and have some help with depression.. drugs are not the answer, but perhaps it could help him out til he feels more confident.





It would be nice if he could enjoy his remission, with proper diet and care, he may never have to face recurrence.. lets hope so.
Reply:No i havent been in your situation before but i can understand how hard it must be for both of you.. How old are you both have you got time up your sleeve to wait or is the biological clock ticking???? There is another angle you have to consider. first, you may not conceive if your partner has had chemo which I'm sure you know and two... if you where thinking of adopting they might not allow it with his high chance recurrence of the cancer. I can understand that he is depressed and worried and i am sure it is constantly on both of your minds... I think you should sit down and tell him how you are feeling, even go to the doctor or specialist and get some advice. He needs to go into counselling to help him with his depression. Cancer not only strips your healthy but affects your emotions so drastically. all the best i hope you can work thru it, but you do have to consider your views in life too and if kids are important to you you have a right to voice your opinion . good luck.
Reply:I think it normally to be depress. I had breast cancer twice. I worry that cancer will return daily. Maybe it time your husband seeks professional help for his depression. It always good to talk to someone who is bias. Maybe he should talk to his primary doctor too. If you haven't done it already, it good to search the net or read some books on his type of cancer to get informed. I also believe in alternative therapy too. I know there's no magic pill to cure cancer but I believe nutrition and some herbal supplements can help keep the disease in remission.
Reply:He would obviosly be having follow up checks regularly with his oncologist.





I have had cancer treatment as have 2 of my sisters and a brother.





We have discussed this and we all get quite depressed whenever we have a checkup due.





We are positive people who like to think we are "better" and no longer cancer patients. The regular check-ups remind us that we are all just in remission and it could always come back.





Perhaps this is what is happenning with your husband?
Reply:I went through stage 4 Burkitts Lymphoma when i was 15(am now 17). The only time I was depressed was during my first couple months of chemo(out of 9 months). I had a psychologist come into my hospital room and taught me some techniques to calm down. It worked for me. She told to start out by just calming yourself down and take long, deep breaths. Think of a place where you have been and just imagine yourself there again and think of the great things in life. Try to think of all the sounds of that place and particular characteristics that please him. I had no problems being depressed after chemo because I just felt lucky enough to still be in remission. According to all my Oncology doctors, after your first year of remission, the chance of reoccurance drops considerably. I also believe kids may brighten his life up and help hm change his mind about them. Put him around kids more often and he may just want to have one. If that doesn't work, try a doctor and think about medication. Hope this helps